Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Teaser Tuesday

Finally I have something new to share! First off, Happy Teaser Tuesday everyone!

Okay, I know I'm a bit late but hopefully people will still read and tell me what you think. I'm going to try to get to everyone's. My computer has been acting weird, so hopefully it doesn't crash. I have a half-day of school on Thursday so I'll be able to read and comment then, if I don't get to it now.

Today's snippet is from Reborn, my first every Science Fiction WIP. The only thing that makes it SF is that it takes place in the future and that there are "aliens".


Gabriel looked up to the sky. I looked up too. All I could see was a torrent of white, nothingness. There were no birds flapping their wings through the air, and the clouds had long since disappeared.

"We should go back inside," he said, grabbing my arm. His touch felt icy to my skin. It was a new type of feeling, one I wasn't sure I wanted to feel, but I welcomed it. He had never touched me before. Gabriel had made it clear, that we shouldn't touch. His eyes slowly found mine. For seconds, minutes, hours, it seemed, we stared at each other, not speaking a word.

We spoke with our eyes.

Gabriel grabbed my other arm, gently this time. His fingers started traveling up and down, analyzing. Goosebumps rose on my skin, and he seemed to be fascinated by them. He tried smoothing them out, his cold hands sending warmth through my body. I felt my heart thudding against my skin. Why was his touch doing this to me?

"Your heart," he whispered. He knew. He had to know. After being here for so long, he had to know what this meant. I knew what it meant. Though I wouldn't admit it to myself, I knew. I gulped. He closed the distance between us, until there was only a sliver of air separating our bodies.

"It's beating so fast. It sounds so..." He paused.

Without thinking, I grabbed his hand and placed it on my chest. The confusion in his eyes morphed into shock. At first I thought he was going to pull away, but his lips started pulling up at the corners. He was smiling.

My voice shook, "Do you feel it?"

He nodded, his dark curls falling in front of his eyes. "What does it feel like?"

"Sometimes I don't even know it's there. When I am excited or scared it starts to beat rapidly. It's like...I can't think of a word to describe it," I replied.

"It does this when you are excited or scared," Gabriel said, looking up at me from under his eyelashes. He didn't know this, but his eyes were breathing fire. I felt my cheeks flush in their presence. "Which do you feel? Excitement or fear?" He paused. "Addison, if you are frightened of me, I'll..."

"No, Gabriel, it's not you. I'm not afraid of you. I'm just a little overwhelmed."

His eyebrows pulled up, "Tell me, what overwhelms you?"

Your touch. Your presence. Everything about you. I kept my lips sealed, even though the answers to his question were right there on the tip of my tongue. A part of me was thankful that though he was an Observer, he wasn't an expert on the language of the heart.

When I didn't answer, Gabriel closed his eyes, and rested his head gently on my chest. He inhaled and exhaled, as if he were breathing in my heartbeats. With his other arm, he pulled me closer and my heart stuttered. He didn't say anything about it though. He just listened.

"Thunder," he murmured.

"What?" I asked, breathlessly.

"I hear thunder. We have to go inside now."

He pulled away.

Something inside of me told me to react.

I grabbed a hold of his hand.

His eyes were black coals as he stared down at me.

"Addison, what's wrong?"

I looked down. "Please..."

His voice was thick," Please what?"

"Stay with me. Out here, a little longer. I know it's going to rain soon. But please. A few more seconds. I need this." I need you.


11 comments:

Rebecca A. Rogers said...

Love the tension! I want to know what Gabriel is. :D

Kaitlin Ward said...

This is very tense and awesome.

DrunkenLilacs said...

I love me some Gabriel already :P

houndrat said...

Ooohh, is Gabriel an alien? Awesome! Nice emotion and tension in this scene!

J.S. Wood said...

I really hope Gabriel and your MC can get together, doesn't matter what he is ;) but I would love to know.

Amna said...

ooooo, I am so in love with Gabriel already! oh my god, the tension here. it was amazing. Yes-sign me up for beta read NOW!!!

Every time I read a snippet from yours, it MAKES me want to write. I guess I just want to be this good :)

Katie Ashley said...

OOOH, this is awesome! I love the tension, and I love how sensual just a touch becomes between them. I want to know wants going on here between these two characters.

Frankly, I wanna stay outside with Gabriel myself!!! LOL

Raven M said...

Thanks for the comments guys!

in which a girl reads said...

Sorry I'm late getting to this!

This was great--I'm so curious about Gabriel and your MC.

I especially liked this line:
"We spoke with our eyes."

Great Teaser! :D

Julie Dao said...

This was a really great snippet! You can feel the tension between the two characters and I love the way you demonstrated it through their actions and dialogue, rather than just telling us in narrative. Great job :)

Karla Calalang said...

This is late, but OMG amazing! I loved this snippet. Nice!

 
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